Bar and Bat Mitzvah Seating: Tables, Teens and Dancing

A bar or bat mitzvah marks a young person's coming of age in Jewish tradition, and the celebration afterward varies from a kiddush lunch to a full evening party. In Chicago and the suburbs, many families hold the party at a banquet hall, hotel, country club or the synagogue's social hall. The planning challenge is balancing two audiences: adults who want to talk and eat, and teens who want to dance. A good layout keeps both happy without anyone feeling trapped in the middle.

Seat by age group

Most parties include a mix of the honoree's friends, family friends and relatives from several generations. Seat them so everyone has a place:

• Family tables near the front. Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and godparent-like friends sit close to the honoree's table or head table.
• Adult friends and neighbors at rounds of 8 to 10, away from the speakers.
• Teen tables close to the dance floor, with the honoree's friends seated together. Many parties set teen tables near the DJ.
• A kids table for younger siblings and cousins, close to parents.

Count tables by guest number

The ratio of teens to adults depends on the family. Count each group before you size the tables, and ask your DJ how much space the stage and equipment need. Our dance floor size guide gives more detail.

Special tables and moments

Programs vary, but many parties include a few special elements that need table space:

• Candle lighting. A table with candles or a stand for lighting ceremony. Check venue rules on open flame. See candles at venues.
• Hora or circle dances. The honoree is often lifted on a chair. Plan two sturdy chairs and a larger open floor, as in our Jewish wedding seating guide.
• Photo or video tribute display. A table or easel area. See signage and easels.
• Guest book or signature item. Many families use a decorated item for guests to sign. See guest book table setup.
• Candy or dessert station. A 6-foot banquet table with a floor-length cloth.

Chairs for the honoree and the room

For the honoree, a statement chair adds fun to photos. A velvet dining chair ($18 to $25 estimated) in the party color or a throne pair ($75 to $150 per pair) works. For guests, ghost chairs ($10 to $14) keep the room open and modern, and Gold Infinity chairs ($9 to $13) give a classic ballroom look. Mix them with the venue's standard chairs and use the better chairs where photos are taken.

Chicago notes

• Many synagogues and Chicago-area venues have their own rules about food, music and decor on Shabbat. Check with your synagogue and venue before booking.
• Kosher catering rules may affect which tableware you can use. Ask your caterer first.
• Winter dates need a coat check. See coat racks for winter events.

Plan your party layout

Tell us your guest count, venue and how many teens and adults will attend and we will help you plan tables, chairs and the dance floor in one call. Book a free 15-minute seating call or request a quote.